Utah and Camping

Harvey is a terrific traveller so far. Baby Center recently sent me an email on 'Your 9 Month Old' saying this is the worst time to travel and take him away from the familiarity of home and routine based on his age. Luckily, it is as my mom said: we are his home.

He thought sleeping in a tent at Horsethief Campground in Southern Utah was amazing. The timing of this government shut down is kind if crazy: we had printed maps with plans to camp Zion and Canyonlands but our plans had to change since the national parks are closed. I called a State park and a helpful ranger said they were full but to check out BLM campgrounds which worked out.

H giggled and played in our exciting fort tent and the fell promptly to sleep. Andrew and I were so exhausted mentally and physically from moving. We both were awake and couldn't sleep. We were way too cold and uncomfortable. So we waited until 6am, while watching H snooze contently, packed up and headed out. 

We had breakfast at a funky cafe in Moab, before hitting the road for Denver, Colorado. This area of the country is full of outdoorsy looking folks. Fleece jackets, bearded men, bandana: they remind me lots of kids from my college era in Oregon.

Leaving Calfornia

We are about to leave our apartment in Santa Barbara and drive across the country. We'll try a stint as East Coasters in the Washington DC Area. Moving (a in breaking down your home and packing everything you might need into a few relo-cubes is way harder than I figured. So exhausted...

Excited about the journey ahead. More soon!

Also: time to change the byline of this blog?? I'm a little nervous because I fit in really well culturally in California. Also SB = So Beautiful. And I love beautifulness.

Baby Must Haves: A Good Ride and Places to Go

Driving around town with my favorite guys. 

I've read a lot of blogs with the the first part of this title and I have lots and lots of baby stuff that's made my life easier. (Though, the number one thing is boobs... Then next important thing to have is arms.) The consumption frenzy that comes with having a baby can be overwhelming. I plan to write a post on useful baby products soon, but in the meanwhile something I appreciate everyday:

MY CAR

Until recently we drove a 1990 two-door Toyota. It was red with flippy lights and went really fast with little effort. And it had incredible gas mileage 35+ miles a gallon. But, BUT, the trunk didn't open consistently and all sorts of things were going wrong with it. It was well-maintained and had a good run but we had started replacing everything on it (and normal things too, like locks, ignitions, etc). Also, I just really really liked the idea of having a car with four doors.

About a year ago, we got our 2005 Ford Focus Wagon on Craigslist.  I had decided to buy a car that day, and saw it the minute it posted and bought it about an hour later.  It was a great price and works wonderfully for us.

Things I love about my car: four doors, and a back seat you can access without acrobatics. It's so easy to get H in and out of the car. And to load the carseat in and out; (sidenote: we don't actually do this often as I thought we would, our guy doesn't like hanging out in his carseat when its not moving.) One of us usually sits in the back with Harvey when we are both out. I sit in the backseat, using the carseat and door for support and give my baby many-a-meal in that car.  I also use the Moby baby carrier we keep in the car (we now have two!) as a pillow to support him. I got the windows tinted when we got the car and am now extra grateful for the added privacy.

Harvey's first zoo trip. Napping while his mom checks out the giraffes.

We can keep his snap-and-go type stroller in the back and his medium sized Britax stroller in the back of the car AND groceries. And a beach bag. And a baby bag. I found it is easiest to keep a whole container of wipes and a big stack of diapers permanently in the car. This way I can avoid public changing stations: I used one once and it was trickier and dirtier than I thought it should be. Our car is my changing station of choice when out. I successfully changed him on the front seat a few times but it hurt my back. Now, I came up with the best solution for us: I fill his carseat with a blankey, moby, changing cover whatever until it is flat...then I put the changing pad from his diaper bag on top of it. I get the diaper and wipes ready. I lay him in there so he's flat.  He's now at a good level to be changed without hurting my back. I get a lot of smiles and coos: he seems to like being up higher.

My view from the beach parking lot.

PLACES TO GO

I get really stir crazy if I stay home for the whole day so I try to make one or two outings each day. I feel like Harvey appreciates the change of scenery and stimulation as well. He loves to sleep when we are out and not as much when we are home.

Places we go:
*Parent group #1. A whole variety of moms and dads with babies about the same age. We meet at the park and lay our babies together on blankets and sit around talking, and feed, change, and burp them together. They also plan happy hours, exercise classes, and a zoo trip that I've attended.
*Baby class through the city college: We sing songs and also learn about infant development. We keep skipping class but I plan to make it back sometime.
*Beach: I might meet up with other new moms from my parent group, or Andrew at lunchtime or post- work. Most often I just go alone with my baby. I get ready to go, feed him, drive five minutes to the beach, arrange him in the baby carrier and walk in the sand for about an hour. I love it because we tend do the same walks we did when he was in my tummy!  I recently tried wearing shoes at the beach once, on a particularly beach tar-y day and hated it (a SB problem). I had sand in my socks and sneakers. I would rather scrub tar off my feet.  Harvey sleeps the whole time at the beach. I will listen to music or call my sister, mom, or friend. Every other day I bring Andrew along so I can do my run while he carries baby in the carrier. I'm just finishing week 3 of the couch to 5k so my version of a "run" has BIG quotation marks. I've done the plan twice before and it worked well.

Harvey loves this time with his dad. I love being able to run and not have to leave them too far behind. 

*The Lake. It's called a lake but it's a reservoir in our neighborhood. We walk around it, wander through eucalyptus groves, and look at birds and the foothills and  mountains and just enjoy being outside.
*Parent group #2.  We alternate different mom's houses and have snacks and conversation, and speakers. This is an attachment parenting group (which is just pretty much what I thought parenting was) celebrating the mother-baby unit. A big bonus of having a baby is meeting so many amazing moms!
*Farmer's Market/ Starbucks  This has become a weekly date with Andrew. I used to walk there, but now if I walked there I'd have to feed and change baby bundle right when I got there. After a feeding we drive and buy things like avocados, cherimoyas, strawberries, and flowers. Afterwards we get large coffees and talk while baby sleeps in his carrier (and once in his stroller!). He wakes up at some point and we play with him in the coffee shop. I am happy to say he is quite well behaved for a baby.

Other places I'm thinking about going:
The library
A music class
To Los Angeles

Other parents: Where did/do you like to go with your baby?
Parents-to-be: Where do you look forward to taking your baby?

I really really am looking forward to taking baby Harvey to Hawaii!

Upcountry Maui: home sweet home. 

Songs for Harvey (Mom Ridiculousness)

Harvey is 12 Weeks Old!

I wish I were a great singer. I'm not, but I sing anyway.
I wanted to write some of the songs I sing to Harvey before I forget 

You can't Hurry Love
I need love, love
To ease my mind
I need to find, 
find someone to call mine
But mama said
No, you just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
It's a game of give and take
 
Rubylove Harveylove
Harvey my love  
You'll be my love  
You'll be my sky above  
Who'll be my light?  
You'll be my light  
You'll be my day and night  
You'll be mine tonight

Baby Mine from Dumbo
Baby mine, don't you cry
Baby mine, dry your eyes
Rest your head close to my heart
Never to part, baby of mine

I Want Candy  I Love Harvey
I know a guy who's tough but sweet

He's so fine, he can't be beat
He's got everything that I desire
Sets the summer sun on fire

I love Harvey, I love Harvey

Sung to the tune of BINGO
There was a baby who had a mommy and Harvey was his Name-O...
There was a Harvey who had an Auntie and Holly was her Name-O...
etc. Then we spell out the names.

Nicknames
 I am a life-long Nicknamer and make nicknames from my nicknames. I haven't really met one I haven't liked. So naturally, Harvey has many. Here are a few:

Butters  (His dad doesn't like that one, he thinks of the South park character. I think more of butterball. Sweet, smooth, and creamy like butter)
Lamb Chops
Love Chops my favorite
Chops 
Chubs now that he's filling out
Harv (of course)
Harvster  what his pediatrician calls him (!)
Harvester
Harvenstein
Harvard
Hearn my late grandfather's middle name/nickname

So now you all know what I'm up to these days.

Coal Oil Point

Right before I had Harvey, Andrew purchased an updated point-and-shoot. We call it our real camera and it doesn't get as much action as the iPhone. Still, I've made an effort to use it when I get outside. The hard part (compared to my phone) is pictures take so much more effort to upload and share.

I wish I knew this family so I could give them this picture. Frolicking on the beach, the place kids and dogs love best.

I love my community! I'm glad Harvey was born here: SB will always be an extra special place for us, no matter where we end up.

A question on my mind: Should I sell my surfboard and/or wetsuit? I got the wetsuit right before getting pregnant. The board has been used about twice a year...and mainly by guests-from-Hawaii. Also, I was swimming in the ocean sans-wetsuit a lot last summer but we had SO many shark warnings that I decided I better stop (Harvey was in me!). So, hmmmm...I know I ought to banish clutter but then again, what's a house without a surfboard?

Harvey Speaks Out

My big 7 week old. I love this voice!

Harvey: 2 months

It's time for a blog.
I've been meaning to write. I want to remember these months and moments and the time when my baby was teensy is already foggy. I saw an 8-day-old and I can't remember Harvey being so small.

Harvey at 2 months:

My boy discovered his feet. He likes kicking off of me. Our middle of the night burping method is laying on my back and propping him up into a sitting position, on my tummy. While we wait for his burbs he loves to kick his legs and watch his feet. It's better when he has fun or colorful socks on.

This week he is nine weeks old and realized he has hands. He swats the animals in his Treetop Friends playgym. Each time he appears surprised like it was an accident but he must be practicing because he's hitting his target with more accuracy. Tonight he was swatting the ribbons on my shirt and caught one in his hand... Andrew said it was a little like playing with a kitty.

He refused the three types of pacifiers I've offered. Occasionally his hand lands in his mouth and he sucks ferociously.

He now watches me when he nurses and pauses to smile at me. That gummy grin and sweet gaze leave me lovestruck. His little fists are getting chubbier and dimple as they grip onto my shirt. When he's full he pops off, arches his back, and sighs contentedly.

Harvey's a great sport to put up with my photoshoots. I really enjoy dressing him in the morning. Off with his baby nighties and on with a long sleeve onesie with pants. It helps build the sense of day vs night (for me anyway!). I have started to tuck away his newborn outfits and am making sure he's worn every 0-3 month item in his drawer. Baby sizes are so weird and untrustworthy. I put on a onesie tonight that said 3-6 months, 12-18 pounds and it was way too small on my 11 pound 2 month old. Oh well. Easy come, easy go.

Today I told Harvey that we had to get ready for school. Well, he slept or ate through his entire Infant Times class while the other moms and babies danced and did movements to baby songs. Seems we aren't exactly morning people.

Harvey actually did go to school before today: I brought him in to meet my clas last week! Dr. Seuss' bday was the perfect occasion for me to go back and read aloud to my students. I fretted a bit the night before imagining 28 kindergarteners pawing all over him. Our visit was a surprise and instead of hug attacks or frenzied energy they were speechless! They all stared in awe... One student whispered ('his hand moved!') and then hands were raised. Some suggested he attend their old preschools while others thought maybe he could be friends with their baby siblings. I have the best cutest sweetest class ever this year and I was fighting back tears at how grown up and lovely and first-grader-ish they seemed. My sub is amazing: the classroom had terrific writing samples and art up. And most importantly she loves them!

My team took turns holding him and getting him to smile. We all decided it would be awesome if I could take Harvey to work with me.

So, I'm blogging from an iPhone app. My computer is neglected and my trusty little phone is doing it all these days. You'll definitely be hearing from me more!

I love being Harvey's mom!

Six Weeks

I can stare at this boy for hours.  And he stares back. I'm startled by how wonderful he is. And that he's mine.

Our beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy.
Harvey has baby pattern baldness. He has thicker fuzzy blond hair on the sides and in the back but the top of his head is now shiny bald. I'm waiting for his little duck feathers to grow in. His cheeks are chubbier and wider and he grew a new chin layer. He's starting to stretch out his body. I love it when he goes from scrunched up to arching his back with his little hand near his face.
His eyes get a little lighter each day. The pediatrician shined a light into his eyes (and let me try it) and it looked lit up like red-eye in a photo. He said that means he'll likely have light colored eyes. While they will likely have my coloring (blue) I see a lot of his dad in his eyes--they are deeper set and have an intensity about them.

Expressions
Harvey coos and smiles (especially in the morning) and we get so caught up in it it is hard to think of anything but him (hard to get a picture). His opened mouth grin and the look of delight in his eyes stops us in our tracks. His coos are so sweet too. This child has an expressive face ... I also can't hide what I feel and his dad has a rubbery (handsome) face full of character.  Harvey's other specialty is the grumpy old man face, or a look of deep concern. As his parents we find them all irresistible. This tiny boy seems larger than life. His thoughts and opinions and interests are forming already and it is a joy to watch.

Opening gifts from generous friends and family. This was at 3.5 weeks.

Motherhood
I really really love being a mom. More than I thought I would. It's an amazing responsibility and I often think of how I have a little man. He will be grown person some day. We feel like he is such a big boy, every day he feels a bit heavier in my arms, but people comment on how small he is.  Are you on your way home from the hospital? When I see him in photos I realize he really is still pretty small.

Doctor Visit
Today he weighed 9 lbs 14 oz and was 22.75 inches.  He got his first immunizations.  I was nervous. He cried out on the second and third shot and his face was beet red and angry but it only lasted a moment. I scooped him up and nursed him and he forgot all about it.  He's been extra sleepy and has a slight fever. It's a little rough. I'm proud of him for being so brave.

This Mama likes blue stripes. I also love his little feet and hands and lack of neck.

Food
He has a healthy appetite and was marathon feeding; at four weeks he was eating 10 hours a day. I use the Baby Connect app on my phone to track his feedings. I didn't mind because it's my job to feed him and grow him but boy was I tired. It's slowed a little 6 or 7 hours a day. I get about 2 hours from the start of one feeding to the next. I didn't realize what an amazing commitment baby feeding is. And I am happy to announce it no longer hurts.

Sounds
Babies make a lot of noise! I mentioned his endearing gurgley coos. He also farts. Very loudly. A and I often credit one another when Harvey is the culprit--They sure sound adult sized. His belches can be equally impressive. I'm learning his language. If he starts a whiney, discontent cry while nursing it means he has a burp. The bubbles in his tummy come out pretty quickly when he is upright and he's happy to eat again.

Baby Love
I've always loved babies but I find that I'm extra interested in babies. And this sounds a little crazy considering how young my baby is (and I'm in no huge rush) but I look forward to having another baby. I can look at pictures of babies all day. Andrew asks, "What are you doing?" when I'm looking at my phone---and I'm probably looking at babies on instagram, on blogs, on facebook. We joined a mommy group and I love oohing and ahhing at the other amazing newborns.

Music
I love to sing to him and I make up many ridiculous songs. I copy the tune of other songs and invent my own lyrics. My family has always loved to sing and make up songs... Plus I'm a k teacher. My life is a musical. It will be fun when he joins in.

Friends
Our dear friends have a daughter, Avery, who is one and awesome. She has developed an interest in babies and dolls since meeting Harvey. He's still not aware of her.  I talk to friends and family on speaker phone since I don't usually have a free hand. Harvey listens and looks around attentively so I like to think your voices will be familiar to him. Also, he/we love google hanging out. So let's make a date, okay?

Smooches
I hope he doesn't mind that we kiss him constantly.

2012: A Recap

It took me almost a month to write this in small sessions. It's so hard to get to the computer these days! 

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?
Made a baby! Attended prenatal yoga classes.
Hung out pregnant in Hawaii. All things baby related.

Also, I went to San Diego for a weekend (the zoo) and Yosemite for my cousin's wedding.  Yosemite truly is an amazing place! Go!

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I just found them saved on Notes in my iphone:
 They include:
Make a photo calendar.
Make more juice with our juicer.
Go to the beach every week.
Invite people to do things more often*.
Other than going to beach a lot, I don't think I did any of things. Honestly, I forgot about them after I wrote them.

*I almost always say yes to invites and love hanging out with people, but I'm not a great planner. I over plan and stress myself out or I feel sad if people can't join in. Also, I like to do things at the last minute with little notice. I think this habit relates to growing up with a lot of siblings my age and friends and neighbors around--I never had to call or invite someone to do something. Friends were just there.

Goals for 2012:
Be good to myself and forgiving of my flaws. Which will help me be the best mom/wife/friend I can be.
Keep in touch with the people who matter most to me. Maybe call a dear friend once a week.
Get back into yoga! It really does fix everything.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes I did! I'm so thankful it happened in 2012 (and not 2013 like some predicted).

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you didn’t have in 2012?
I have most things I want. 

7. What dates from 2012 will be etched upon your memory, and why?
April 20th: The shocking moment I found out I was pregnant! Andrew bought the test and looked at it before I did.
Early June: My first 3-D ultrasound appointment at 12 weeks. I saw a little perfect body waving his arms around at me. I laughed as it hit me there was a REAL BABY in me.
August 3rd: Finding out we were having a boy. Well, hearing it confirmed...we both strongly suspected.
Dec. 22, 2012  Giving birth to my son Harvey. Seeing him and holding him for the first time really was the most unforgettable moment of my life!

20 weeks. The day before we found out baby's gender.

8. What was your biggest achievement of this year?
Giving birth! See above. Staying really healthy through my pregnancy: walking and eating well. Also working until I was 38 weeks pregnant; being the best teacher I can be for my students always feels like an achievement. 

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hmm. Maybe not blogging or writing more. Not printing photo books or doing more with my photos.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No. Other than the aches and pains of pregnancy. 

11. What was the best thing you bought? Plane tickets to Hawaii. Baby stuff-so glad this house is properly nested--I wouldn't have a minute to think about what I need and where to put it.


12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My devoted husband. Our labor and delivery nurse who amazed me with her support, compassion, and encouragement.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Gun people but I try not to think about it. 

14. Where did most of your money go?
Good food is our biggest expense (beyond rent). Unusual expenses for us were things like a crib and a carseat.

15. What did you get really excited about?
My sister going to Africa for the Peace Corps.
Seeing my Grandma in Yosemite
Spending most of the summer in Hawaii absorbing good island energy.
Finding out other friends were pregnant! 
My little baby boy.

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
Someone Like You by Adele. (or was that the year before?). My students would sing it under their breathe last spring....so hilarious.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer? 
 Happier, (fatter-but for a good cause!), and maybe about the same.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Prenatal yoga.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Late nights at work.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
In a bleary eyed state in my bedroom trying to figure out how to feed my 3 day old baby. We finally made it downstairs open presents at 11:30pm.

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?
Yes, with Harvey.


22. What was your favorite TV program?
 Downton Abbey, Mad Men, Parks and Recs, Parenthood. We just started "Sons of Anarchy" and "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia."  Any recommendations?

23. What was the best book you read?
The Game of Thrones series (also discovered listening to the audio version!)

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth which I read the first trimester and again the week before I gave birth. It normalizes the act of unmedicated childbirth and helps you think it sounds doable. Turns out it was for me.

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Podcasts (not music but it's what occupied my listening time). Also, the Fleet Foxes. I went to their concert and loved it.

25. What did you want and get?
 My baby! An unmedicated, positive labor experience.


26. What did you want and not get?
 I got it.

27. What was your favorite film of 2012?
 The Descendents.

28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 31 in October. We went out to dinner at a fancy French restaurant.

My 31st birthday. And a new necklace from A. 

29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
 Meditating?

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2012? 
Comfy dresses, maternity slacks, and yoga capris and tank tops. COMFORT. 

31. What kept you sane?
Andrew (his warmth and good breakfasts), my co-workers who always had my back, and google chatting with my cousin Jan.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?
Funding for schools. I got fired last spring (for the third year in the row) and a pay cut. Fortunately the measures for bonds and taxes to fund education passed on our ballot. Fun Fact: I was the poster girl (me with my mouth wide open teaching kinders) on the flier for our district explaining the measures.

33. Who did you miss?
My sisters. I am thankful for technology but I wish we saw each other every day. Also, many (or most?) of our friends in SB have graduated and gone on to post-docs and careers around the country. Gosh, I miss them all.

34. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.
Be open to what life gives you. Also: Babies really are the best gift ever! 

35. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

As the river flows, gently to the sea
Darling so we go, 
Somethings were meant to be

Take my hand, take my whole life too,
But I can't help falling in love with you.

-UB40 version

36. Bonus Question: What else will always remind you of 2012?
Janna's wedding, my family's excitement over their first grandbaby, and having the sweetest kindergarten class to date.

New Friends

Like many newborns Harvey really does like black and white images. We put up a few sea animal cards next to his changing table and his new friends really distract him. Watching his mesmerized facial expressions makes us happy too.

I recommend! 

Happy 2013!

 Happy Happy New Year!
Yesterday was New Years Eve and Harvey turned 9 days old. It was the first time I felt a little normal. We even made it to the beach to watch the last sunset of the year. Harvey slept in his carseat for the short drive (about 2 miles) and through the whole excursion. We tried out our stroller for the first time. It jostled him on the wooden pier and was doable on the hard sand (but not amazingly smooth or easy--it's not a jogging stroller). He slept through it all and seemed to enjoy the jostling and fresh ocean air. His mom sure did! I look forward to Harvey reaching the 8 pound marks so we can try him in our Moby baby carrier. Has anyone put a smaller newborn in one?

He likes his carseat so far. Phew! 

I've been making an effort to shower daily, change my clothes, and come downstairs to the living room for a few feedings. I did not realize how all-consuming a little baby was. Or maybe I knew but now I KNOW.  The advice to "sleep while he sleeps" was very difficult the first week of his life and seemed a bit impractical. I'd have about an hour to myself and feel restless and pumped with adrenaline or overwhelmed with emotions. Also baby needs burping and a diaper change after nursing, Mom needs to use the bathroom and eat something. Then it would start all over again.


Baby shows us his moves in the middle of the night.

Today is the first day I slept while baby slept. I logged about 7 hours in random 1.5  naps.  It means I missed the beauty of the daylight and fell short on my ambition to take a walk.  But last night the room started shaking around me and scared me into being more disciplined with sleep. Harvey's wide-eyed, curious, and engaging moments take place in the middle of the night and in the early morning hours. I want to be present for them. I felt like maybe I was doing something wrong, with baby up all night and hard to rouse during the day. He will NOT wake up to eat and is now very clear about it when he is ready to eat. Though I record each time he eats or poops, I feel like "keeping a schedule" with my baby is a little silly and I just need to listen to my baby and myself.  Andrew reminded me people say, "Sleep when he sleeps" and not "Make him sleep when you sleep."  For anyone whose done some kind of sleep training--did you start with a newborn? HOW?

Andrew is an amazing father. He makes and brings me three meals a day, has done the majority of the diaper changes, does the laundry daily, and can't wait for his turn to hold/sooth Harvey between feedings. He tells me I am beautiful and and that he looks at me with a new respect after seeing what my body can do.  He's tolerated my bossy and weepy moments with grace and kindness. He tells me I'm a wonderful mom and that he picked me knowing I would be.  I hope Harvey grows up to be a man like his dad!

Dad changes diapers. Not Harvey's favorite activity.